It is said that the Bodhisattvas have been reincarnating for numerous generations. They have manifested as various avatars for thousands of years…coming back to planet Earth lifetime after lifetime in an attempt to help humanity free itself from suffering and Samasara…which means that, so far, they have had a 100% failure rate by conventional standards.
At this point, one would wonder if the mission to emancipate our species from its self-created misery is a sunk cost…and yet, the Bodhisattva compassion is eternal, without end…and, therefore, beyond any concept, or possibility, of failure itself.
Moving Beyond Simplifications Of Success And Failure And Seeing The Greater Reality
The concept of “failure” and success (the latter of which often falls within categories that include selfish accumulations that destroy the environment and countless lives/beings for the sake of greed and sensual pursuits) are interesting notions indeed…with failure being the one of the two that strikes the most paralyzing fear into the hearts of homo sapiens.
But…from failed scams and terrorist attacks, to failed abusive and/or toxic relationships, I am sure that you can think of at least one thing that you are happy has failed miserably in your life.
Despite this reality, however, most people are still vehemently “afraid” of failure…afraid that if everything that they do in life does not have a very specific outcome within the eyes and minds of others, that they themselves are failures…which is so far removed from the actual Truth/Reality that the belief is flat out delusional.
The Origins
The fear of failure is said to have its roots in human biology, where making a miscalculation in the early days of human evolution meant death and/or earning a lost limb or two. And, over the centuries, as our species has survived and moved forward to build empires, this primitive Samskara has been continually reinforced over time, and activated so pervasively via social pressures, that it fuels every structure that can be observed in everyday life, from school, to work, to romantic relationships.
Starting from childhood and extending to one’s last breath, fear of messing up has been one of the major influencers on human behavior without question.
The Reality
Today, however, I am going to remind you that not only is your fear of failure absurd and irrational, but it is also a complete waste of time that can actually cause more problems than good (contrary to what your mind may be believing as it incorrectly assumes that it is protecting you in some way by ironically failing to act upon one thing or another that might actually be beneficial to you and or our species).
And, in order to do this, we will start with the most important thing to note in our conversation: the term’s true, implied, definition.
Although the sentiment that we are discussing today is often referred to as the “fear of failure,” this terminology is actually somewhat of a doublespeak. The term “fear of failure” is actually first, and foremost, an untruth at its core when it comes to most situations in which the feeling is encountered since, what is more accurate to say is that the term underscores a fear of social rejection and/or the perceived ridicule/punishment that one anticipates will come from “falling short” of imagined perfection in the imperfect eyes of imperfect human egos.
If one was simply going through life learning and living without fear of judgment/rejection from others, mistakes would not create anxiety when there is no threat of death looming for the body-mind, and failure (not getting everything that one plans to accomplished perfectly as intended) would be seen as a normal part of experience, learning, and growing as opposed to dreaded as a potential ego threat.
How To Stop Wallowing In A Miserable Delusion, Since You Are Not, And Can Never Be, A Failure
The concept of failure has no inherent existence. Failure is an unreality that is dependent on varied interpretations of context and relative/malleable perspectives that are not, in any shape or form, grounded in Truth/Reality.
Your ego construct (false-sense-of-self) defines itself/its identity by external factors (accumulations, relationships, associations, etc), but you are not, nor will you ever be, defined by, nor reduced to, a patchwork of shallow, temporary, fragmented external markers, events, and so forth. You are a whole and complete being onto your Self, who may participate in a number of different roles and experiences in the world, but your essential and True Nature/who you are, is never defined by any thing regardless of any concept or perspective that claims so.
Your attempts to pursue one thing or another might “fail” (or “succeed”) in the world depending on whether the conditions are able to be met/put into place to manifest a given outcome at any given time, and your, and/or other people’s limited perspective on reality may vary depending on the fluctuating state of your and their mind at any given time, but, you are not made more or less by any outcome in life nor by any passing perspective, nor will any accomplishment or lack of accomplishment do anything for you other than to serve as experience that you can draw value from, as well as provide karmas that will temporarily effect something else in the ever-changing external world that is not within your personal, nor full, control (but manifests as a collective doing).
If you are “successful” at buying your “dream car,” for example, this will certainly effect your behaviors leading up the accumulation of the vehicle, and the vehicle’s accumulation will certainly influence certain aspects of your life and someone else’s bank account when you purchase the item from them. You, however, are not made more or less successful for having that, or any, car. Your emotions may fluctuate, your belief systems may change, your social status may be impacted (for whatever reason), you may travel a bit more differently, and how “you” and others perceive “you” within the context of relevance in their imagined story of life may shift, but, nothing will change the fact that you are pure spirit manifested in a given form and context of human existence temporarily, eternally unchanged by anything that occurs before or after your birth and/or inevitable bodily death.
Remember who you are and never go around attaching yourself to objects, places, people, or events in a desperate attempt to have some relevant sense of personal identity in the world for dramatic roleplays with others and society that will only lead to delusion and suffering.
You are already “relevant,” already “somebody,” based on the sheer fact that you exist, connected intrinsically to all that is and you belong in existence itself.
Having to any additional artificial and fleeting construct of identity (such as a “social group,” or “class,” etc.) is irrelevant to who you are.
Plus, unless you are assuming roles to make the most out of your manifestation in any given form, to be of actual value to the betterment of the world in some way (since you are here and can clearly see how things are connected and are impacted by certain actions), nothing that you “become” in the world truly matters, or has any value, in/to the world unless it contributes something that is actually useful to the world…and even this does not change who you are.
Simply put, if you are pursuing anything for your own ego gratification, it will always inevitably be useless, and most likely destructive, since the ego that you are catering to is not even “real” in the first place (it is a mental fabrication that you have somehow identified your Self with). Success or failure in an illusion will always be unreal.
Pursue What is Good–One Way Or Another, Failure Is No Less Of A Useful Option Than Success
The only true failure in existence is non-existence…and that doesn’t even exist.
Strive to do your best to pursue what is good and right in the world. Nothing that adds value to the betterment of our collective manifestation is a failure, since, by definition, only failing to perform any function at all is a failure.
Contribute anything good (kindness, love, a useful invention, your time/energy, etc.), within your abilities and capacities based on your unique manifestation within space and time and you are achieving success on some level regardless of your “bottom-line” for financial or ego gain based on relative perspectives. And always remember that not all perceived successes actually contribute something good to the world, nor do all perceived failures create set-backs as opposed to progress.
At the very least, continue to succeed at failing forward toward something that benefits all beings.
No progress ever came to our species from those who never even tried to make a contribution to our collective due to “fear of failure.” And no one owes any ego the validation of a perfect and understandable narrative of what accomplishment in any area, especially spirituality that is to be known not observed, looks like. As long as you are in service to the greater Spirit that connects us all as one, like lifetimes of Bodhisattvas, there is no such thing as failure for you.
So, now the question is: so what if you “fail” (to be rich, or famous, or even to fully accomplish a desired outcome when it is beyond your limited ability to do so within a certain context in society/beyond object accumulation, and/or beyond your personal ability to control certain outcomes in any given lifetime)? Do you still make a contribution to the world?
What if you try and you don’t “fly” in the eyes of those who cannot see wings soaring through the heavens because they are too busy expecting success to come flying in on a loud and heavy jet plane, accompanied by fanfare after you parade your costumed body down a red carpet that leads to nowhere? Are you still a failure if your main purpose is not to influence others to buy one thing or another in the world to make someone rich? Give up?…Or…
…just be Absolutely clear on your definition of success?
Or, at the very least, remember that fears are only useful if they actually protect you in some way in the face of real danger, not if they only cause suffering and prevent you from doing what is good, or valuable, or “right,” because you are concerned with your ego losing face in the eyes of those who, most likely, will have failed to even venture out and try to accomplish anything beyond the ordinary/selfish/worldly/conventional pursuit of objects (with any earnestness) due to their fear of ridicule/”failure” itself.
Pursue what you feel/know is right, and create a deeper level of success than that which is superficial, relative, and fleeting. Trust that a greater/truer success can be achieved through “you,” and your right actions, in the world (and beyond), and that you will attain this goal, when you align your clear intention for the greater good with the collective action of Existence itself and all that is for infinite lifetimes that have passed and are to come. Win or lose, ensure that everything that you do is endeavored with full confidence and devotion to the higher Truth. Excellence and value like that surpasses Earthly categorization and reduction.
And always remember that some goals, are just so immense and beyond “you,” that they require you to move outside of the realm of egoic concepts altogether to see and attain Real eternally divine success that transcends the trappings of this world.
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